isn’t the money free and be God the tenner I put down wins again and I am as happy as a pig in S H one T. I now have fifty euros to play with and Bowies Star Number Four in the virtuals pops up at 9-1 and the whiskey is fair coursing through me veins so I slap it down on account of Space Oddity has to be the best album ever and the Thin White Duke is not long dead. I throw fifty on him over five furlongs in a field of fourteen and I sit back not feeling tense at all and watch as he starts slow.

The virtuals are a visual feast. The screens showing the races have three bits of detail to tell you how you are doing. There’s the race itself with the horses running along and you see them from a few different camera angles throughout the race. The detail isn’t great though. Down along the bottom of the screen you’ll see